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/Insatiability. Part One: Personal
From whence she came
People often ask how I came to be this way. How did my life and focus end up revolving around sex? My answer is simple and twofold:
I've always loved sex.
All women love sex.
This is a two part series. In this installment, I'll address my own personal love of sex. I'll get to "all women" next week.
As for me, I allow my intuition and my pussy to navigate my erotic choices. How did my pussy come to be such a vocal guide? Of that I'm not sure. I might say that this is the case with all humans, that their genitals have a strong say in suggesting a direction, and that I simply never squelched that voice. Others probably do. From the start of my sexual adventuring, I had exceptional fuck-radar, choosing men with sexual confidence and experience and, more often than not, large cocks.
I have studied sex. Studying different schools of sexual thought enabled me to articulate some of the experiences I was having. From a young age, I could feel that sex was an energetic portal, that it had the ability to open, unleash and transform energy. Even the notion of orgasm has a transformational quality associated with it: la petite mort, or the little death, it's called.
I explored Tantra, since as a philosophy, it acknowledges that sexuality and spirituality are intimately wound in each other. Our Western culture attempts to polarize sex and God, but I believe we gain more and can heal the bodily disconnects in ourselves by understanding that they are both a path to the same place.
I adore marathon fucking and in fact I need it to feel alive. Having sex, even phenomenal sex, leaves me rejuvenated and sex-washed yet always with the feeling of wanting more. My body hums, my pussy pulsates and I am poised to draw in another man or the same man like a wanton, archetypal Venus Flytrap. I become a walking, hip swaying symbol of femininity, an energy that perpetually submits and receives.
I've always loved sex.
All women love sex.
This is a two part series. In this installment, I'll address my own personal love of sex. I'll get to "all women" next week.
As for me, I allow my intuition and my pussy to navigate my erotic choices. How did my pussy come to be such a vocal guide? Of that I'm not sure. I might say that this is the case with all humans, that their genitals have a strong say in suggesting a direction, and that I simply never squelched that voice. Others probably do. From the start of my sexual adventuring, I had exceptional fuck-radar, choosing men with sexual confidence and experience and, more often than not, large cocks.
I adore marathon fucking and in fact I need it to feel alive.
I explored Tantra, since as a philosophy, it acknowledges that sexuality and spirituality are intimately wound in each other. Our Western culture attempts to polarize sex and God, but I believe we gain more and can heal the bodily disconnects in ourselves by understanding that they are both a path to the same place.
I adore marathon fucking and in fact I need it to feel alive. Having sex, even phenomenal sex, leaves me rejuvenated and sex-washed yet always with the feeling of wanting more. My body hums, my pussy pulsates and I am poised to draw in another man or the same man like a wanton, archetypal Venus Flytrap. I become a walking, hip swaying symbol of femininity, an energy that perpetually submits and receives.
Previous
Cynthia Cortes
I've acted out my sexual fantasies, all of which involve a mix of exhibitionism, coercion, and groups of men. I strip, I expose, I fuck. I am used. Relentlessly. I am reduced to some essence of receptivity, of holes and servicing. The more I submit, the more I can let go during sex, the stronger I become when I step out of the bedroom. Suddenly, the tasks which seemed overwhelming are now completed easily. If I can drop into my femininity and have a place to sexually surrender and inhabit my female essence, I am rebalanced.
What this tells me about myself is that I need a place to submit and I need it often. I need to surrender deeply so that I can lose all sense of who I am and simply move into a new space; one where I'm not thinking anymore. I'm operating from feeling, rather than intellect, and I'm lucid in my body. This is where I love to be. Here, again, we entwine with the spiritual. Most spiritual paths promote the idea of stepping aside the little self and allowing the divine to flow. It's about surrender.
My insatiability, my perpetual hunger, define me. I see them as my desire to grow, embodied. If sexual energy is life force energy, then I am brimming over.
***
Next: Insatiability. Part Two: Universal.
Preview: "'Ah,' you say, 'but not all women love sex.' Perhaps they don't outwardly, but from a biological perspective, women are predisposed to be as voracious, or more so, than men. It's in our genes."
What this tells me about myself is that I need a place to submit and I need it often. I need to surrender deeply so that I can lose all sense of who I am and simply move into a new space; one where I'm not thinking anymore. I'm operating from feeling, rather than intellect, and I'm lucid in my body. This is where I love to be. Here, again, we entwine with the spiritual. Most spiritual paths promote the idea of stepping aside the little self and allowing the divine to flow. It's about surrender.
My insatiability, my perpetual hunger, define me. I see them as my desire to grow, embodied. If sexual energy is life force energy, then I am brimming over.
***
Next: Insatiability. Part Two: Universal.
Preview: "'Ah,' you say, 'but not all women love sex.' Perhaps they don't outwardly, but from a biological perspective, women are predisposed to be as voracious, or more so, than men. It's in our genes."
- 05/04/2009
